During my wedding planning process, I got asked a lot if I was stressed with wedding planning. There were some moments, mostly the week of the wedding, that were super stressful, but overall- wedding planning wasn’t hard or stressful. And it doesn’t have to be! It’s such a myth that every bride hates wedding planning and that grooms aren’t involved and it’s going to be a horrible process. I had a great time planning my wedding so I wanted to share some tips on how to stay stress-free as a bride!
Know Your Non Negotiables
Before you even start looking for the perfect dress or venue for your big day, sit down with your fiance and identify what you both want your day to look like and what you have always imagined. Then, make a list of all the things you want, your fiance wants and what you want. Decide what has to be there- for me, that was an outside wedding with a reception under a tent.
Knowing what you want before you start planning will help you narrow down your choices tremendously and will keep you and your fiance on the same page. It is also helpful when outsiders such as family and friends are trying to be helpful and suggest things. It’s very easy to say “thanks for the tip, but that goes against our vision for the wedding” or “we’re going with a DJ because of reason x and that’s not changing, but thanks!”
Take a Break From Planning
If planning starts to get too stressful or overwhelming, take a break. It’s okay to not be constantly thinking about your wedding. Depending on how long you have to plan, there are some months where nothing needs to be done- all the big stuff is done and the little stuff has to wait until a little closer. Use this time to go on dates with your fiance or hang out with some friends and don’t talk about weddings!
Over-communicate
Communication is key as a bride. With your fiance, your vendors, your bridesmaids, etc. For your bridal party- set your expectations up front and be willing to be flexible if your friends can’t live up to what you want. Trust me, as someone who two bridesmaids dropped out of my wedding, the bridal party is an important part of the day, and you don’t want any resentful bridesmaids with you on your big day! Being open and communicating when they need to be there, what to wear, bring, dress requirements, etc. as soon as possible will help everything go so much smoother.
For my vendors, each and every one got an email about a month before the wedding with the timeline and any vendor specific questions or information they needed. For example, my caterer got the timeline and table layouts, my photographer also got her shot list, the videographer got his shot list, my DJ had a form for us to fill out but I also wrote out wording and specifics he needed to know about how I wanted the day to run. Nothing went wrong on my wedding day because all my vendors were prepared. Your vendors are professionals (or at least they should be!) and they have their own ways of doing it, but you also hired them, so you can reach out and tell them exactly what you want.
Hire a Day of Coordinator
If you can afford/ don’t want to do all of the planning and can get a wedding planner, go for it. But if you can’t/ want to be more hands-on with the planning, do yourself a favor and at the very least get a day of coordinator. My coordinator was an extra addition to our venue (and not the same as the venue coordinator! Very important to note.) and she was a lifesaver! Totally worth the $900.
We had a call about two months before, did a venue walkthrough about a month before, she okay’d my timeline (I did it but she totally would have), communicated with all my vendors and answered a million questions I had and made the tent layouts. On the day, she set up everything I brought, checked on me a million times, brought us drinks after the ceremony, made sure the boys were ready and 5 million other little things that I didn’t even see. No one came to me with an issue and I didn’t have to work (or ask my family and friends to work) on my wedding day except eat lunch and get married!
Wedding planning doesn’t have to involve stress so I hope these tips help! If you want to chat more or need more wedding planning advice, message me on Instagram!